The Lovedare

26 - Love is responsible
Romans 2 vs 1 : Therefore you are inexcusable, o man, whoever you are who judge, for in whatever you judge another you condemn yourself, for you who judge practice the same things.

Take time to pray through your areas of wrongdoing. Ask for God’s forgiveness, then humble yourself enough to admit them to your spouse. Do it sincerely and truthfully. Ask your spouse for forgiveness as well. No matter how they respond, make sure you cover your responsibility in love. Even if they respond with criticism, accept it by receiving it as counsel.

 

Comments

Need to ask her forgiveness



Need to talk to her again one on one.



Someone told me that asking for forgiveness can be putting a burden on someone that they have to decide to forgive or not when they might not be ready to decide to forgive or not. I struggle with this. Any thoughts?

Community reply
Asking forgiveness is never wrong to do. If they aren't ready to make that decision, let them tell you that and then drop the subject. Either way, that burden is on them regardless of whether or not you ask. And, while being stuck in unforgiveness is a sin, you don't get to be the one to tell them that.
Community reply
Take it to God first. Pray and ask for him to soften the heart you want forgiveness from. While it is true we can't force people to forgive on our time. With that being said being stuck in unforgiveness is also a sin. So you want to pray for them and ask for Gods assistance.


I struggled to do this after getting a horrible lawyers letter from him. But I did it, he asked if I say forgive you does that mean you think we are back together? I said no I am only being obedient to God, he then said of I forgive you.

Community reply
Great job I hope things have gotten better for you guys.


Day 26 I had my list ready and was going to talk to him that night to ask for forgiveness, made my list so I don't forget. Then got an email with the letter from his lawyer with nothing offered to me. Not sure if I want to continue with this

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*time* " not home"
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Continue with the dare and allow God to finish His work, if anything, for you. As i said previously to others, it took home for a marriage to go sour, it will take time to repair. Praying for you.


Stugghling to find the time to sit with hubby to discuss this. He went to see a lawyer on Wednesday and I saw mine on Thursday. Still feels like a nightmare I'm living in.

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Prayer will be the essential key in your communication, pray God aligns yall both timing and all.


learning to hear what causes her to act like she wants out the marriage



I sincerely tried to apologize and he blew it off. When he did try to talk, he went off on a tangent about what he assumed my response would be and then decided not to explain things at all and walked off and won't talk. feeling so broken.



Pray for forgiveness from the heart of my wife. Admit my wrong doing, ask for forgiveness. She choose to ignore me, however i know through faith, God will touch the heart for forgiveness.

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He can and prayers up just stay in the in the fight and keep praying for her ok. Remember the times when you don't see anything he is still working ok.


He told me for the second time he doesn't love me and still wants a divorce

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that's the devil speaking, do not be discouraged.


I've tried I'm done she has still been lying and no body deserves to do be lied to continually. I want to be with her but honesty is not something she can honour me with and I deserve better.

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being discouraged is natural, keep fighting. God is working even when you can't see it.


my exwife wants me to stop trying, give up and move on. I'm not going to. repenting to her my sins was not as hard as I thought, the thought of moving on is harder. I don't think she will take me back, I didn't start this to give up now.

Community reply
Thats the best attitude you could have. Do all of this in prayer, if the "old you" wasn't the type of man that she wanted to be with, fear not, for Jesus makes all things new. She might just see your dedication and change her mind on the long run.If it takes more than 40 days, it will still be worth it


Ive been doing this the entire time. Apologizing for letting her feel alone, unprotected, financially failing her, and more. She throws it all back in my face and doesnt see change in me.



i have been working these dares for over 2 months. no changes from my husband. Refuses to forgive me or try in the marriage. blames me for everything. Fighting for this is making my depression worse with constant rejection

Community reply
hugs. agreeing in Jesus name for a change in His heart.


Learning to listen and hear... Still! Thank You, Jesus, for your Word and guidance!